Just empty streets and me walking home

The day started with an unusual severe pain in head, unknown for some time. Probably the effect of last night’s vomiting & the dreadful pain. I felt sorry for Fayyaz. Frankly i was tired but i wanted to join his sister’s wedding. Around 7:30pm i spoke to him & assured him that i shall be joinging but GOD knows when fell asleep & when i woke up it was around 10:00pm & i was feeling like an arrow piercing my head. Unable to move i felt desperately for someone to hold me but found none. Lying on my back i imagined those soft hands on my head & thoughts . . . . . . . . . . . .Suddenly i found the cell was buzzing, i checked a message from Fayyaz, but GOD, i didn’t have credit to reply. I put my head against pillow drowning into the night . . . . . . munib please mujhey kahin duur le jaao es dunia se . . . . . . .So the day today went as usual reading paper & stuff & later kind of busy doing normal stuff when Fayyaz called again for his sister’s marriage. I found helpless in making him understand the difficulty i was in. The main PTCL exchange for PECHS was down & it was must for me to stay there in whole shift as i was the shift incharge. I even had tried to call Zohair early & move but that plan fail as well. But Fayyaz was in no mood to listen & he proved no help, shut down the phone with a very broken heart probably & i could really understand his position. I wish i could make him understand few issue here at the office. Notihng went good except my colleagues Asad & Alizaib. I am sorry but its fucking bullshit going into details. The crux is i missed the second day too. It was prolly for the first time i was worried about what Fayyaz may make out of this. As usual , my consolation was my music that i am related to . . . . . i have decided to leave now (12:00) . . . Just empty streets and me walking home to clear my head. . . . .  i was definitely missing someone badly . . . . on side was the empty Shara-e-Faisal , air rushing through my hair as if making up the loss of the absense of someone’s hands & i could hear a sound revolving in my head while my mind was lost somewhere else , my eyes closed or trying so fighting the air ocassionally . . . . was i right , i asked my self. Was i . . . . .

The City feels clean this time of night.
Just empty streets and me walking home to clear my head.
No it came this moon so bright.
I’m affected more than i had guessed.
What was it?
Is this love is not meant to be?
If your heart is not ready to open.
If you make it i’ll see.
It’s broken.
Is this love is not meant to be?
If the heart is not ready to open.
If they make it i’ll see.
Always broken. . . .
It’s a quiet time before the dawn.
And i’m half past making sense of it, was i wrong?

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